User blog:Zeon1/Zeon1's Super Awesome Happy Funtime Reviews! (Which are Really Fun!)
Hi, welcome to my new reviews. I know I'm not the most expierienced author, but I do have a critical mind. Hope you enjoy! Latest News: I will be revising some reviews, in order to keep it professional, KV-style. In other words, I'm going to try to HELP users improve their stories. Ratings: A= Great B= Pretty Good Q= Somewhere in between C= Meh D= Ugh F= Will cause annuerism from pure terriblness. 'Dragon Ball: Birth of Fear ' Pros *Good idea *Nameless Saiyan is cool *The sagas are well named, and the characters are interesting. Cons *Needs dialouge. Otherwise, the characters feel flat, like paper masks. *A little more character development. I would like to know why the Nameless Saiyan is the way he is and maybe, I don't know, some female characters might help. Keep a balance in characters. *They don't really cuss in the televised, edited version of Dragon Ball Z. No, I don't want you to write this like you're a rejected writer from AnimeLabs. I just don't like cussing in a story. Final Rating: B-''' Dragon Ball Z: First Legend Pros *Like the idea of the Original Super Saiyan's story being told *Good writing, well divided *Interesting characters *Like the idea of a Greek tragedy Cons *It is currently far to gory for me. SOME cencorship would be nice, but it's up to you and this is a minor problemo. *Using the f-word the way you use it offends me. Final Rating: '''B 'The Invincible Frieza ' Pros *An interesting take on Frieza Saga *Like the references to DBZ Abridged. Cons *Zarbon's rebellion makes no sense at all. *How did Cui get on Namek?! *Why did you stop the Ginyu Force's poses?! That's one of the most funniest parts of the sentance! *I still don't understand why Piccolo had Tien come back... he might be the second strongest, but Piccolo would never do that. Final Rating: Q''' Dragon Ball: Namekian Wars Pros *Interesting Idea *Love all-italics story *Sharr is awesome Cons *Odd grammar. Why stuff like "Hialo had three opposing foes. Black and his gang." Why couldn't it say, "Hialo had three opposing foes, Black and his gang."? *Black is a totally unrealistic name for a Namekian, though there are few Namekians that are actually named. One could be called Edwardo and we wouldn't know. Final Rating: 'A-' Dragon Ball: Aftermath Pros *Good continuation of the original *Sharr's death was kind of noble Cons *Same grammer troubles *How could Nail kill a Super Saiyan, if a Super Saiyan could kill Frieza, and he lost to Frieza? Just doesn't make sense. *Kind of erupt ending. The story was over before it had begun. Final Rating: '''B+ 'Sixth ' Pros *Really good writing *Excellent at conveying Krillin's misery *Love Krillin finding the magazines. Fits perfectly with him giving Master Roshi the magazine. How'd he lose all but one? Cons *Could have explained a little bit more on Krillin's situation. Final Rating: A''' Dragon Ball: A Lowly Saiyan Pros *Enteresting story of how the Saiyans got Planet Vegeta *Like Frieza's "negotiatians." Cons *Does the Tuffle leader end up being Baby, or Dr. Myuu, or who else? A little lost here. *Arubt ending. *Same spacing issues. Final Rating: '''Q 'Dragon Ball Z: Worlds End ' Pros *Who is Ataru? *Good adaptation of Bardock's last stand. Some stuff he said at the beginning of Cooler's revenger could be added, though. Cons *Same grammer and spacing issues. *Arubt ending. *Don't like the "There were only..." part. Try to make it more dramatic. Final Rating: B-''' Dragon Ball GT: Frieza Strikes Pros *Like the idea of future warriors protecting Earth *Ginyu turning into a rock was hilarious Cons *Why so short? Couldn't you combine this with An Unknown Foe? *Same grammar and spacing issues. *Arubt ending Final Rating: '''Q Dragon Ball GT(Series) Pros *Interesting premise *The fight scenes are still entertaining and action packed. *Super 17 was cool and is worth notice *The idea behind the Shadow Dragons was good. *Super Saiyan 4 Cons *Too short. *The fight scenes were also too short. *Bad voice acting, Goku's was the worst. *Pan was too annoying, I actually nearly hated her. *Gohan was a total loser. *Goten was a total loser. *The Shadow Dragons were too short. *The ending was possibly the worst ever. *Plot holes fill the script. *Not enough screen time for Uub. *Baby Vegeta's transformation makes no sense *The way you become a SSJ4 is incredibly stupid. *The Kais are only back for a brief time. *Vegeta reverted back to his "I must surpase Kakarot" phase, even though he made peace with that at the end of Z. *Pan's even whinier than Gohan. *Terrible script. *Super Saiyan 4 was outclassed right after it was created, what's up with that? Goku goes SSJ4, beats up Baby, suddenly BOOM! Baby's stronger. Closing Comments: GT had good ideas but terrible execution. The hopes and dreams behind it were just, but bad lines, voice acting, and canonicity ultimatly sink a series which could be so much more... Final Rating: D''' The Super Saiyan Among Us Pros *Has a halfway decent idea. *Vegeta's "restore my pride" thing, was actually something I can here him say... but not as a kid. *Killing Goku was a good twist, though see the last con. Cons *You don't send "text messages" through scouters. You can communicate like it's a Cell Phone, or record what's around you. *"That" not "thet" *You don't punch someone "consistantly". You punch them "constantly". *"Hole" not "whole" *There should be a question mark after "Tarble, were's Tarble", not a comma. *Vegeta would not care about his brother, who is much weaker than him. Even in an AU. *Vegeta saying multiple things is fine, but seperating them in different paragraphs confuses the reader. *There should be a paragraph skip between Jeice said and Jeice climbed. *Once again, scouters cannot "text" each other. *"Isn't" not "isen't" *A space between "at" and "least" would be greatly appreciated. *Vegeta yelling "SO DIE!!!" is REALLY!! getting annoying. *Cooler would not spare Vegeta. He would kill him quickly, and only be mildly disappointed. *Killing Goku was a terrible move. Closing Comments: This story has the potential to become something really fun. However, killing several characters who people actually like, reducing all the characters into their basic stereotypes, and overall terrible grammar annihlates the chances of success so far. Final Rating: '''D Who the heck are you?! The first episode of Dragon Ball P is a decent comedy. It's not the funniest I've ever read, and it's not the lamest. The storyline is somewhat interesting, but the dialouge is bland and uninspired, using some TFS quotes to top it all off. Plus, every character talks like a gangster. Not cool, man. Final Rating: Q''' Dragon Ball T Wait, this is a COMEDY? I never knew. The idea behind Trugeta is incredibly stupid, the story is almost unreadable, not a bit of it is funny, bringing in Yu-Gi-Yoh and superheroes is a terrible idea, the huge SSJ level is so overdone I'm ready to kill this author, and did I mention that none of this is funny? The metal planet turning into a unicorn just sucks, neither Trunks nor Vegeta know the Spirit bomb, thus making this impossible as well as stupid. And yes, I know this is supposed to be a comedy, but when none of it is actually funny, it's hard to take it seriously. Final Rating: '''F Android 18 vs The Benefactor (ERB) Pros *These two characters fighting verbally makes no sense, which counts as a pro (except if it's done horribly. SS11, I'm looking at you). *I can actually hear 18 saying this stuff. Cons *The Benefactor makes a horrible gangster, especially after you read his dialouge in The Forgotten. *I, however, cannot see The Benefactor saying any of this stuff. *How come the person at the end always "wins?" Final Verdict: An interesting idea, truly. However, in order to make this work, some characters must be made OOC. I honestly have a hard time scoring this one. I like the idea, but at the same time I don't. I'll just give it this. 'B-' Soon to be Reviewed The Terror Of the Androids by Nimbus.69 Dragon Ball: Retribution by Nexus-Ank'hu Dragon Ball GVB by TeamUnitedNerds Please Note: As some stories progress, pros and cons will be updated and ratings will change. Category:Blog posts Category:Blog posts Category:Reviews